Once more unto the breach, dear friends, once more;
Or close out the year with no Sketchy head.
In term time there's nothing so becomes a member
As modest silliness and humility:
But when the blast of election blows in our ears,
Then imitate the action of Marlon;
Stiffen the diaphragm, summon up the lung,
Disguise fair nature with a healthy respect for the medium of sketch;
Then lend the breath an amused aspect;
Let pry through the portage of the mouth
Like the brass cannon; let the mirth o'erwhelm it
As gleefully as doth a rounded cheek
U'erhang and jutty its tensed eye,
Swell'd with joy and welcome escape.
Now part the teeth and stretch the nostril wide,
Let loose the breath and bend up every spirit
To his full height. Laugh, laugh, you noblest Comedy fans,
Whose humour is fet from Horrible Histories-proof!
Shows that, like so many Pythons,
Have in these parts from morn till even cheered
And unsheathed their pens for abundance of ideas:
Dishonour not your mothers; now attest
That those whom you call'd Vic and Bob did beget you.
Be copy now to writers with funny bones,
And teach others how to Sketch. And you, good yeopersons,
Whose limbs are in Exeter, show us here
The mettle of your levity; let us swear
That you are worth your £8 membership fee; which I doubt not;
For there is none of you so dull and base,
That hath not noble lustre in your hearts.
I see you stand like jesters in the wings,
Straining upon the start. The game's afool:
Follow your spirit, and upon this nomination form
Cry 'Um, hello, I would like to run for Head of Sketch please.'